


whatever a sun will always sing is you

by musicspeakstoo



Category: Fantastic Four (Comicverse), Marvel 616, Spider-Man (Comicverse)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, First Kiss, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-28
Updated: 2018-06-28
Packaged: 2019-05-30 00:26:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15085031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musicspeakstoo/pseuds/musicspeakstoo
Summary: He dreams of Johnny as the sun for weeks. Sometimes in the dreams, he can hear Johnny screaming in agony and Peter’s helpless to save him. In others, Johnny smiles at him lovingly, tells Peter that he’s lighting the world just for him.Both are terrifying.





	whatever a sun will always sing is you

**Author's Note:**

> My first foray into spideytorch! This is set some nebulous time after Battleworld but before anything else happens. Possibly excessive use of the sun as a metaphor. Unbeta'd because I really wanted to get this out. Title from e.e. cummings.

He dreams of Johnny as the sun for weeks. Sometimes in the dreams, he can hear Johnny screaming in agony and Peter’s helpless to save him. In others, Johnny smiles at him lovingly, tells Peter that he’s lighting the world just for him. 

Both are terrifying. 

It gets to the point where Peter’s absently doodling suns on everything. He starts avoiding Johnny.

It’s not Johnny’s fault that Peter’s fixating on him forced to be a living sun. Nor is it that Peter’s got an ache in his chest a decade old which has suddenly become unbearable. Almost as unbearable as Johnny’s face once he realizes that Peter’s gotten in the habit of canceling plans and not lingering after team ups. 

Johnny calls him and Peter lets it go to voicemail. He listens to it only after he’s sure the Fantastic Four are well on their way to space.

“What the hell, man?” Johnny demands. “Why are you bailing on me all the time? If this is you being a moody asshole, get over it. I’ve got some sweet pranks to play on Ben that I could use a hand with.” A pause. Johnny sounds smaller as he says,“Is it something I did? Whatever it is, I’m sorry........I gotta go, Pete, please call me.”

Peter deletes the message and goes to work.

The thing is, Johnny’s always been the bright light in Peter’s life. He’s the teen heartthrob Peter was blinded by and angrily competed against — the darling playboy of the Fantastic Four, the superhero community’s own First Family. He’s so attractive it’s hard to look at him some days, even when he’s not on fire. Johnny’s almost directly opposite Peter’s coloring too, golden hair and blue eyes contrasting to Peter’s brown.

He gets attention anywhere he goes, you can’t help but be drawn to him, while Peter can easily blend into a crowd. He’s got money that Peter can only dream about and has access to science that makes Peter weep with envy. Peter’s always been envious of Johnny, but envy has shifted to make room for love. He’s started to crave all of Johnny’s attention, wants to sleep beside him every night and when he comes home from swinging he wants Johnny to be there. He wants to lure Johnny away from whatever car he’s fixing up with kisses and filthy promises. 

There’s so much he wants from Johnny but doesn’t know what he would give in return. Peter’s kind of a romantic, something he inherited from Aunt May and Uncle Ben who, despite all their years of marriage, kept the spark alive with a longstanding date night and made a point to always eat breakfast together. He can’t buy Johnny nice things nor can he take Johnny fancy places. Peter can’t buy Johnny his dream house. Anything Johnny wants he already has, so Peter’s at a loss.

It’s a moot point because Johnny doesn’t love him. There are a few things Peter is concretely sure of and that’s one of them. Before Battleworld, before he’d seen Johnny burning bright, Peter had some semblance of acceptance of the fact. Now he can’t control his longing and being away from Johnny makes him feel cold.

He misses Johnny’s warmth.

Peter does what he always does when he gets overwhelmed — finds someone to punch. Then, when that only makes him feel a little better, he sticks his nose in something Matt’s investigating. And then kicks Cindy’s ass in Words With Friends. Still jittery, he goes to Aunt May’s, where they watch Jeopardy and she gets more questions right than he does.

When he still feels awful, Peter phones a friend.

Mary Jane is in LA living her best life, and possibly having a long-distance relationship with his sometimes-criminal ex-girlfriend. She doesn’t need any of his shit.

“I’m in love with Johnny Storm,” he blurts out when she picks up.

He doesn’t know why he picked MJ to tell, except for the fact that the women in his life have always shaped the best parts of him.

She laughs at him, not unkind. “And how long have you known that?”

He hesitates.

“Peter?” she prompts.

“A really long time,” he replies, knowing what she’ll glean from it. He trips over his words in an attempt to explain himself, “MJ I loved you I really did, and I loved Gwen I swear it’s just that he’s—”

“I know, Peter,” she interrupts. 

“What?”

Peter’s fairly certain he hears her eyes roll. 

“I’ve doubted a lot about you, Pete; your sanity, your fashion choices, your reliability…”

“Alright, alright I get it,” he laughs.

“My point is,” she continues, “I never doubted that you loved me and I don’t doubt that you loved Gwen. Now I know that you love Johnny.”

“It’s that easy?” he asks skeptically.

Her laugh this time is mean, “Tiger, nothing is easy in your life but you’re making yourself needlessly miserable. I know Johnny better than I know most of your hero friends, which should really tell you something by the way, and the way he looks at you........I really think you should tell him how you feel.”

“What does that mean? How does he look at me?” Peter demands.

“Oh no, I’m not doing all of your emotional work for you. I’d tell you to put that big brain to use but I’m pretty sure that’s what’s causing all these problems. Follow your heart Peter, the part that isn’t reserved for punching bad guys.”

He closes his eyes as he smiles, picturing what her face must be like, that mixture of amusement and annoyance that’s as familiar as his web shooters.

“I really miss you being here to kick my ass into gear. Thanks for the advice.”

He’s pretty sure she shrugs when she says, “Yeah, well, I’m fucking your ex-girlfriend so me helping you snag the Human Torch makes us even.”

He laughs so hard he almost drops his phone.

“As much as I would love to sit here all night picturing that, I apparently have a pretty boy to bag.”

Instead of a goodbye, MJ makes kissy noises into the phone and then hangs up.

“Knowing my luck, this could all end in disaster,” he shoots out a webline. Staring up at the sky he says,“Wish me luck, Gwendy.”

He sets out in the direction of the Baxter Building, hoping that Johnny’s back by now. He gets about halfway there before a blur of red and black races past him.

“Getting slow, old man!” Miles calls cheerfully.

Peter frowns then calls out, “Don’t you have an English test tomorrow?”

Miles does a flip and then lands on a fire escape two buildings ahead. Peter heads there too, Johnny’s waited this long, he can wait a little longer.

Miles waits until Peter’s hanging upside down next to the fire escape before taking off his mask and rolling his eyes.

“Don’t you have a job? Or friends?” Miles asks. “Why are you out hassling teenagers?”

“Listen young whippersnapper, I’m just trying to make sure you’re getting a good education. It’s part of my job as a mentor.”

Miles scoffs. “Yeah, okay. I do have a test tomorrow but I’ve been studying all night and the words were starting to swim.”

Peter nods, “So you figured you’d go out, swing, clear your head a little?”

“Pretty much.”

“Well,” Peter says, feeling as though he’s done his duty, “as long as you get home in time to get some sleep, that’s important too.”

“Like you ever did that?” Miles says, pulling the mask back on.

“Another part of this mentor gig is to prevent you from making the same mistakes I did.” He smiles, “Now go on, Spider-Man, I know you wanna get back to the night so go. Lecture’s over.”

“Thanks, Spider-Man, see you around.” Miles takes off with a whoop.

Peter’s about to swing right side up when he remembers.

“Hey,” he calls to Miles, “Good luck on your test tomorrow.”

Miles twists in midair to give him fingerguns before continuing heading away from Peter.

“You’re gonna make that kid really weird,” a voice says from beside him.

Somehow Johnny’s managed to sneak up on him. Peter supposes his spider sense doesn’t factor in emotional danger.

“Hey, Torchy,” Peter says. "I'll have you know that kid was weird before we met."

Johnny looks at him with an unreadable expression.

“Can we talk?” Peter asks, “At your place?”

“Promise you’ll show up?” Johnny asks, arms crossed in front of his chest.

Peter winces, “Okay I deserved that. But yes, I promise.”

Johnny uncrosses his arms and sighs, “Fine, then. I’ll see you there in 15 minutes.”

He makes in there in ten.

He swings in through the window, his preferred method of entry and exit. Johnny’s waiting for him on the couch.

Before Peter can do more than take off his mask Johnny says, “Reed and Sue are out and Ben took the kids to some street fair thing.”

The _so we’re alone_ is implied and Peter’s nervous, so naturally he deflects.

“Golly gee, Johnny, talking about necking when we’re not even going steady.”

Johnny glares at him, “Really? That’s how this is gonna go?”

Peter sighs, “No, but you know me, hot stuff. Why be serious when you can make a poorly-timed and probably inappropriate joke?”

Johnny looks at him, annoyed, but Peter sees a flash of fondness underneath.

He takes a deep breath, “First off, I know I’ve been avoiding you and I admit it and I’m sorry it hurt you.”

“But,” Johnny prompts.

“But I had a reason,” Peter finishes. And then stops.

Johnny waves his hand, “And that reason was......? What? You just got sick of me hanging around and decided to cut me off instead of saying anything? I figured this was gonna happen someday but I didn’t see you being a dick about it, a mistake on my part.”

Peter frowns, “What? Johnny, no, I could never get sick of you. Why would you think that?”

Johnny shrugs and won’t look at Peter as he says, “I know you’ve got other, smarter friends. I figured one day you’d get bored of dumb ol’ me, I’m not much but a pretty face and a guy with powers. Nothin’ special about the Human Torch when you get down to it.”

Peter reaches out and cups Johnny’s face in his hands. “Nothing could be further from the truth, gorgeous. You’re plenty smart Johnny, I promise. And even if you weren’t, none of that matters. I love you, is what I came here to say and I love you just as you are — flames and all.”

Johnny’s face shows his surprise, “You love me?”

“Yeah, going on a little over a decade now.”

“Then why were you avoiding me?” Johnny asks, confused.

“Because you turned into the sun and it’s all I could think about,” Peter confesses.

“I don’t get it,” Johnny says, still confused.

Peter huffs a laugh, “Not gonna make it easy for me, I see. Okay, then. You turned into the sun and it was the most beautiful and most horrific thing I’ve ever seen. And it made me realize how selfish I am. I didn’t want you up there at all but I also hoped that you were holding on for my sake. That scared the shit out of me, how intensely I felt like that.”

“I thought you said you’ve loved me for years,” Johnny says, then blushes.

“I have, sweetheart, I really have. But I figured you don’t love me back so I let how I feel sit on the backburner and focused on other people. On Battleworld you were bright and beautiful and powerful, three things I love about you. Suddenly it was all I could think about, I didn’t want to put that on you.”

Johnny frowns, “Pete, I’ve been in love with you for years. Maybe not as long as you, but for a real long time. Ask Sue or Ben, or anybody we know. I’ve been so obvious, I thought you not saying anything was your way of letting me down easy.”

Peter smiles, presses his forehead to Johnny’s. “We’re a hell of a pair, aren’t we?”

Johnny — finally! — smiles at Peter. All that warmth and beauty directed at Peter, just like he’d wanted. 

“Yeah, I guess we are.”

Peter leans in and kisses him, soft as anything. Johnny whimpers and melts into him. Peter puts his hands on Johnny’s hips and pulls him in to deepen the kiss. His lips are soft and taste like the ridiculous lip stuff Peter’s always teasing him about. 

His mouth is hot, just like Peter dreamed it would be. 

They part, both of them panting for breath.

“I love you,” Peter says, just to say it again.

“I love you too,” Johnny says, grinning. “Wanna watch a movie?”

Peter gives him a mischievous look, then picks him up. He lets out a sound closer to a moan than a gasp.

“I think we can do better than that, hot stuff.”

Peter drinks in the sound of Johnny’s laugh as he carries him to the bedroom. 

They say staring at the sun will make you blind. He’d do worse, to be with Johnny.


End file.
